What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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