Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
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