Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
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can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Randomize