I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
