Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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