Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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