You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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