am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
its not stalking. its research.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Randomize
