Moan for me like Helen Keller
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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