Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
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