All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
Randomize
