So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
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