I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
