Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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