we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
