moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize