The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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