you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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