it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
