North Korea, Best Korea!
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
