There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
