Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
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