Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
