yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
It's not a walk of shame if you run
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
