And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Will exercising make me less horny?
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