ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Randomize
