only if we run a train.
done.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize