You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
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