You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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