i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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