Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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