And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I can't turn off my feet"
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
