Whoa Z and x make the same sound
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
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