What tipped you off? The sombrero?
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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