So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize
