I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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