Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Randomize
