She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize
