i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
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