Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
Randomize
