then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
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