how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize