yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
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