I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Randomize
