bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize