Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
