i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Randomize
