With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
