How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
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