there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
Randomize
