do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Randomize
