im having a threesome with these popsicles
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
please don't ironically join a cult
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